While we were fast asleep on the eve of the Ride the Bridges benefit  bicycle ride on Sunday the 15th, a ride to benefit the Northern California Special Olympics (we were riding the  55 km on the tandem), a horrible, horrible person killed innocent people in Orlando for no reason. I couldn’t comprehend it when I heard it on NPR as we drove to the start of the ride, and 4 days later, I still cannot. I see outrage, grief, outpourings of feelings on social media, outrageous words emanating from the mouths of people who command a huge share of media content, and none of what they say makes any sense, or adds perspective, or comforts the families and friends who are suffering loss.

You all know me, I have words and I use them, usually (I think) cleverly and interestingly, or you wouldn’t read my blog (all 3 of you; I love you!), but in this instance, I have nothing. I have feelings, and I have not the words to describe them. Mostly, I want to cry, and cry for the parents whose child was dragged into a man-made lagoon at the Disney Resort in Orlando (why not “alligators live here; pay attention” signs, Disney? Boo!). So many feelings, so much sadness, and no words.

I read the words of other people with a fair amount of social media influence, or opinions, or more words than I have, and I wonder what drives them to say those words, to opine on a topic of which they have no actual experience or knowledge, and their words are splashed all over periodicals and the Internet. I halfway admire that, and halfway am repulsed that they can sum up their feelings and knowledge of what happened so quickly.

I suspect it will be months before the people immediately affected by this awful, terrible action by a disturbed person can even begin to process this event, especially given how the media is in their faces, looking for their words before those people have even begun to understand their lives without their loved ones. I wish the media would relax and let these suddenly and unexpectedly bereft people deal with their awfully-altered lives.

I have no clever words, no time to refine my feelings. I wish I could hug all those survivors and families who lost loved ones, to give them a piece of humanity,because the virtual stuff is okay, but cold, and these people need a human touch.

I offer sympathy and peace to them, and to the Universe, and hope these two tragic and unrelated incidents offer ways for people to reconnect and share peace and love with the world.

Orlando, I’m sorry for your losses. That is all.